I was always one of those guys who wasn’t sure I’d make a good dad. I was adopted by my step dad at age 7 and our relationship wasn’t really rainbows and sunshine growing up. The two examples I had of dads weren’t really the best. Sure, both contributed to who I am in one way or another, and I didn’t want to be like them.

Then in 2011, I learned I wasn’t going to have a choice. My (then) wife told me she was pregnant. It got real, and it got real quick for me. A few months into it I learned I was going to be the father to a son. I gave that son all three of my last names. My mom’s name, my birth name and my current name. Jackson McCord Stewman. The man with three last names!

I’m like most entrepreneurs, if I do something, I do it 100%. So I made a decision to be the “dad I never had.” I read books. Learned all I can. Took 4-5 different classes and asked every parent I knew, a ton of questions. I wanted to be prepared when the day came.

Flash forward almost 5 years later, and little Jackson and I have an amazing relationship, despite his mother and I being divorced. I’m about to re-marry as I write this, and I’m also a Dad to a 3 year old boy named Asher. Asher is Amy’s son from a previous relationship. So technically, I’m a parent to two boys 3 and 4 years old. It ain’t easy. At all

I’ve learned a lot from my boys. Every day they teach me something new. They are so inquisitive and relentless in their pursuit of whatever it is they want. I’ve applied a lot of what I’ve learned as a father, to my business. When we get old, we forget things. Our children are great reminders of some of the most profound, yet simple things in life.

Patience is one of the main things I’ve learned from my boys. By nature, I’m not a very patient person. I want what I want, yesterday, and I get a temper when it don’t happen. When you have two toddlers, that’s just out of the question. I’ve had create a habit of manufacturing patience.

I’ve used that same ‘coping mechanism’ in business. As a salesman, our prospects can be relentless and inquisitive. Having the patience to listen, understand and press forward with the sale, has really improved my business in many ways. Sure, I’m not perfect at having patience, but I’m a helluva lot better now. Thanks to my kids.

Breaking Things Down To Simplicity is another area that I’ve had to get good at for my kids. If not, they will keep asking “why?” and Asher always asks “How?” he’s going to grow up as an engineer or something. I’ve learned to give the simplest answer up front so that even a toddler can understand it. I use this with prospects too and it works perfect. 

My Kids Motivate Me to do more than I normally would. First off, they cost a lot of money. (I spoil them) Second off they deserve a better life than I had, and I’m working my ass off to make sure that happens. When your kids beg you not to get on a plane or go to work, you are motivated to make the most of what you can. If I’m going to be away from my sons, I’m motivated to charge a lot of money for taking time away from them. 

Legacy Thinking is not something I ever really had in mind. But when your 4 year old son looks at you and says “I wanna be a Hard Closer” you start thinking about how your kids will one day take over the family business. Now I’m looking at building a legacy business. One I can hand off to my boys and allow them to skip college if they want. I’m also saving money long term for them. Until they were around, I lived like it didn’t matter after I was gone. Now I know it does and I run my shop accordingly. 

Pattern Interrupts are something you normally wouldn’t learn from a toddler. You may never know what it’s like to have a 3 year old walk in a scream, while you’re hosting a webinar with 5,000 people on it. I can tell you from multiple experiences, this is one massive pattern interrupt. For me AND the audience. Also, when a toddler is screaming and begging for something, you learn some really good pattern interrupts. These interruptions transfer over well in sales. I use them all the time.

Being a dad is rad, but being a dad who’s dedicated to building a life for his kids takes a lot of work. You know what else takes a lot of work? Running a business and managing people. If you can manage a business, you can manage kids. Running a home and running a business are very similar. If you can do one well, you can do both.